Offense, hurt and the like!

I have been hearing and in many a way, feeling these feelings as I enter into conversations with churched people more than those who are unchurched.

I wonder why this is so. I blame it on many things, like, Satan, the past, circumstances, people, people, people and people. Are people being too sensitive? Do we have expectations that are too high? Are we insensitive? Are we too this or not that enough? What happened to the LOVE that we profess Sunday after Sunday? Is this offense what really sets us apart and makes us holier than the unchurched?

Is there a difference between unchurched and unbelievers? Yes.

Many unchurched are those in the "hurt" and "offended" category... They are moving eventually to the "unbelievers" category if the churched ones don't watch out! So the churched are the ones with ALL THE PRESSURE to perform!

I really wish people could see past offense yet that is what is so LARGE and LOOMING in front of them. I wish I could take it away from them. I wish I could be their ALL SUFFICIENT savior! Really, I wish that! (the all-stupid me!)

When there are only 9 pot covers for 10 pots, there isn't much I can do no matter how much shuffling and juggling I do. You know, sometimes, it gets to me.... I am now officially offended by the offenses offended people experience (like it is any of my business!) I wish they would stop feeling the way they do. I wish I could make it go away or better yet, wish the things that happened to them never happened...

Alright... I know what I am supposed to do and say and behave, etc. but I am permitted to FEEL emotions so long as I work them out with God. That is what I am doing....

I am reading this book entitled, "Bait of Satan" by John Bevere a book NOT for the faint hearted as he really spells out much about being offended. (Things we harbour and even forget but when we see or talk to a particular someone or an unrelated event similar to a hurtful event in our past occurs, we just get upset for no apparent reason... he says that it is probably an undealt-with offense.....) Perhaps that is why things become GLARINGLY clear to me now. Since I have not finished reading this book, I shall not comment too much...

It is the better book by this author. Probably because I am reading it at the right season?! His other books, Breaking Intimidation and Thus Saith the Lord I didn't finish...

So, any lessons for me today? I am still learning but am willing to go thru this phase knowing that something good is going to come out of this, Lord!

Josh is sick and having his exams, PCK is recovering from laryngitis.

I would really love a shopping and a beachside holiday..... some new shoes, Laura Ashley outfits, laze around the pool side....

Precious moments.....

1. Joel and his first memory verse
Today I took time to encourage Joel to memorize a bible verse and he did! Hurrah!

2. Why blog?
Someone asked this and am trying to respond.. so that I have a record of things that matter to me and when it happened. Also, to think things thru. I get muddled up at times and writing helps some.

Why post it? So that people who may or may not be interested in my life and my thoughts can know and I don't have to re-relate them!

3, People who tell all but don't listen
An ex-cell member who seemed quite rattled by a MWR (as in BGR) situation called me to air her concerns and woes. I felt so much anxiety and pain in her as she explained that she had done all she could to help the couple who knew they were on the wrong track and yet refused to take any remedial action.

What more could she do in this situation? She admitted that she wanted to get away from this couple and not need to face them and see them, so to speak, ruin their lives... she felt so guilty for having those feelings!

I am more concerned for her as she seemed too deeply involved herself to be able to be objective... I promised to pray alongside her and also for her to rest in the Lord and for Godly wisdom in dealing with this "bleeding" situation....

4. Resurrection of the fish tank!
I have resurrected my fish tank after more than a year of mourning. It was for Joel as he loves fish (and nags me endlessly about it!) We shall see if my 2 angelfish survive the night!

5. Joshua's exam
Josh said that his music theory Grade 3 exams were easy! I was worried about him when I dropped him off at SMKSJ this morning. He seemed so nervous and fretful (first time jitters, I guess!) so I continued to pray after leaving him. When I picked him up later, I mentioned this to him. To my surprise, he said that he supposed that, it was why the exam was easy!

To many, Josh seems like a regular 12 year old. I guess he is to everyone except me (and PCK as parents la!). He is my firstborn and so so special! I can still remember looking into his eyes (and he mine!) when the nurse brought him to me immediately after he was born.

He was MY baby, so precious, so alert, so so Josh! Beautiful eyes, perfect fingers and toes! (things i could check quickly!) I think every parent should tell their children (sometime or at different stages of the child's lives) just how they felt when they saw them for the first time... the emotions and thoughts that go through our minds are truly feelings we should carry and keep with us (esp. when the kids do something really naughty and you want to strangle them!!!) ok but seriously, there therapy to be found there... I really do thank the Almighty for such a wonderful, beautiful, most precious gift! Of course, Joel too! Now, that boy is warm sunshine!

6. With grateful thanks!
I've got a BREATH OF FRESH AIR, COOL BREEZE AND WARM SUNSHINE in my life! Thank you Abba for your gifts and providence!

Why is influence important?

My thoughts keep running to the question of "influence" and its importance.

I have not been able to accept some of my own arguments for it and thus within my own mind am at a stalemate. This is terrible for someone like me who likes to classify EVERYTHING and put them into their rightful places in my head. The drawer remains open...

Have been feeling much better this past week. The school hols are this week end and SPM results will be out soon too! Josh will have his music theory exams this Saturday as well.

Also I want to STOP using the word "busy" to describe time I spend. A friend told me that using this word as a reason for not doing something/seeing someone, is like saying that the other person isn't important enough for me to find time to see/talk/meet, etc.... It sounded so terrible when I first heard her say that.

When I thought about it a little more. to my horror, I came to realise that there was more than an ounce of truth in it! If someone says, "Oh, I am sorry I couldn't see you as I've been busy..." perhaps it can AT TIMES mean that we are not a priority in that person's life... Realising this, I shall try my level best to avoid using that word and also making sure that I show people more respect and consideration.

Hope to spend a little more time with Mummy dearest this week! She's just back from her Melbourne/Sydney/Adelaide holidays with my sis and think I should go be with her some this week.... missed her lar...